Books of 2019: Quarter 2

Grey Sister by Mark Lawrence

"The two moved in a flowing contest of position and stability, flurries of blows finding nothing but air. It might be a dance, and a beautiful one at that, but Nona knew the form held scores of moves for disabling or killing a less skilled opponent in a quiet and efficient manner, any of which could be used in a heartbeat if either woman gained sufficient advantage."



Between the events of the last book, Red Sister, and this one Nona Grey has moved from Gray class to Mystic class, completing her introduction to combat and poisons and moving into harnessing magical abilities. She and her fellow classmates still mourn for the one they lost. The Convent of Sweet Mercy is also still recovering from the theft of its shipheart, an ancient artifact that allowed those around it to better grasp their abilities. Despite this, Nona continues her studies, deciding if she will follow the path of servitude toward The Ancestor, or the path of the sword. Within the walls of the convent though, the wealthy elites have not forgotten the shame Nona brought upon on of their families. At the same time, a new enemy emerges, one that seeks to use ancient power to conquer what is left of their world.

Obviously one that I should've written about after I finished it rather than waited almost a year to try to recall with my terrible memory. I'm sure a lot more happens than I've lead you to believe especially since I think it took me a month to read. It's probably one of the reasons I continue to give shitty descriptions of these stories. I'll try harder once the third book comes out in paperback.

Once again, the thing I like the most about Lawrence's writing is the lack of details. A lot of times in High Fantasy, entire paragraphs are dedicated to descriptions of castles, or caves, or forests whether it be to the shapes or colors or its history (which then usually isn't even relevant to the story). Lawrence's work tends to skip all that bullshit and just give the details you need to know, the ones that are important to the story.


One Shot by Lee Child

"He stared upward and saw nothing but sky. He closed his eyes against the glare and started to think about ego and motive, and illusion and reality, and guilt and innocence, and the true nature of randomness."

"'You got medical insurance?' he asked.
The guy nodded.
'Dental plan?'
The guy nodded again.
Reacher hit him in the mouth. Right-handed, short swing, hard blow.
"Get that fixed,' he said."


So it's finally the book I've been trying to get to, the one that inspired me to start these books in the first place. If you've seen the first Jack Reacher movie with Tom Cruise, you know what this story is about. On a regular day, a lone gunman sits in a parking garage and shoots seemingly at random several people down below. The city is in terror and the police begin their search for the man. In record time, the man is apprehended with all the evidence against him. When questioned, the only words he says in his defense is "Get Jack Reacher." Reacher is already on his way though, having seen the news report and making a promise to the accused that if he ever stepped out of line again that Reacher would be there to bring him down for good. As the evidence against the gunman mounts, Reacher senses that something isn't quite right. Eventually, he'll find himself not only searching for evidence to clear the falsely-accused, but to find those responsible.

If you're getting annoyed of these stories, well One Shot isn't even the halfway point so there's plenty more to come. In one of the few times I can recall, I think I did like the movie more than the book. The Reacher character in the movie had a more of a "not caring about the law, only what's right" attitude especially when all of the bad guys turn up dead in the movie (the book leaves a couple of them still alive). The book introduced a couple more characters that I was okay with the movie cutting out for the sake of time and to move the plot along.


Paper Magician by Charlie N. Holmberg

"'The trick is getting the Folds right. Everything must be aligned just so, or the spells won't work."

"At the same moment, Lira dropped the leather bag from her shoulder and, with a quick command, half a dozen severed hands rose from its mouth, bloodied and raw at the wrist, their fingers pale and violet, their nails jagged and blue."


Despite receiving the top scores from her magical school, the school board assigns Ceony Twill to apprentice as a paper magician rather than giving her a choice in the decision (something about there not being enough Paper Magicians). Once she binds herself to paper, she cannot control any other material. To make her situation worse, her tutor, Magician Thane, is rumored to be an odd and eccentric man who hasn't taken on an apprentice in years. Surprisingly, she'll find the magic in paper to be more amazing than she could ever imagine. Just as her lessons become more and more interesting, she'll be forced on a quest to recover Thane's heart after a dark magician steals it from his chest.

Rather than just stumbling across this book on the shelves of Barnes and Nobles like I normally do, this popped up as a suggestion by Amazon when I was purchasing some other books. I spent several trips to Barnes and Nobles looking for it. Apparently 47North is one of Amazon's publishing companies so that's why I was unable to find it, and why it kept being recommended. I think I mostly gave in and bought this book because of an old anime (I can't even remember the title) and there was a female spy called "The Paper" and she could manipulate paper to fight people or something. The story itself was good, I liked the characters and the different magics that could be accomplished through paper. I think the one thing that kept bothering me was that I couldn't figure out ... where they were, if this was supposed to be an alternate Earth, or an alternate timeline, or if this was our Earth, then when this might've taken place.



Assassin's Quest by Robin Hobb

"Why do you chop your life into bits and give the bits names? Hours, days. It is like a rabbit. If I kill a rabbit, I eat a rabbit. A sleepy sort of disdain. When you have a rabbit, you chop it up and call it bones and meat and fur and guts. And so you never have enough."

"'You do not understand. Were Molly standing here before me with our daughter, still I would have to seek my king. No matter what is done to me, no matter how I am wronged. Still, I must seek Verity.'"


The final part to the trilogy! I don't know if the trilogy has it's own name and I'm not going to look it up. FitzChivalry, the bastard son of former King-in-Waiting Chivalry and King's assassin, awakens from death to find the Buck Kingdom in shambles. Regal, his uncle, after spreading false rumors of King-in-Waiting Verity's death, crowns himself king and wages a war against their recent allies, the Mountain Kingdom. He abandons his people to the Red Ship raiders, who now move inland from the coasts and destroy village after village. Forged Ones, Buck citizens captured by the raiders and transformed into zombie-like beings, roam the countryside, stealing, raping and murdering. But Fitz is done with being a King's Man and decides to put it all behind him to live his own life. After a botched revenge attempt and seeing first-hand how his kingdom is being ravaged, he begins his quest to seek out lost King-in-Waiting Verity and restore him to the throne.

Unlike other sword and sorcery High Fantasy novels, the only magic in this world comes in two forms: The Skill and The Wit. The Skill allows the user to mentally connect with other Skilled ones to communicate long distances. This ability can only be used offensively against an enemy by spying into their thoughts and briefly taking over their bodies, casting illusions into their minds. The Wit, an ability despised as "an unnatural connection between man and beast" allows the Witted one to communicate with animals and sense living beings within a perimeter around them. When they bond with a specific animal, in Fitz's case the wolf, Nighteyes, the human and animal can share information, sensing what the other senses.

As good as Hobbs' writing is, the story feels too ... long. Personally, I don't like dream sequences as, typically they do nothing to advance the plot and usually deal with things the reader already knows. Unfortunately, there are several "dream sequences" involving Fitz Skill-dreaming, his consciousness drifting into the minds of other characters so he can see and hear and experience what is happening around the kingdom. These scenes are important so that the reader can know what is going on in the rest of the world while Fitz is on his quest. It's just that it makes the story feel longer than needed.


When you are Engulfed in Flames by David Sedaris

On watching a fly get trapped by a spider:
"It was a trapped fly, and as I bent forward to get a closer look, a spider rushed forth and carried it screaming to a little woven encampment situated between the wall and the window casing. It was like watching someone you hate getting mugged: three seconds of hard-core violence, and when it was over you just wanted it to happen again."

On telling his friend that he is gay:
"Next on my list of people to tell was my former college roommate, Todd. I hitched from Raleigh to Kent, Ohio, but once I got there, the time didn't seem quite right. It was harder telling a guy than it was telling a girl, and harder still when you'd taken too much acid and were trying to keep the little people from sticking pins in your eyes."


This makes the second of David Sedaris' books that I've read. I still have no other way to describe the books than to call them a collection of stories from his life. His humor is perfect for me and I laughed throughout the entire book. It's the way I would like to tell stories, maybe I'll actually start writing some again. His collection of clothing, the time he spent at a morgue, quitting smoking while in Japan, these are just some of the stories found in this book. I would have liked to put up other great quotes from the book but they were just too long for the set-up and joke.


The Book of Extraordinary Deaths by Cecilia Ruiz

In this book, Cecilia Ruiz complies some of the strangest deaths ever recorded: giving both a short account of the death and a beautiful illustration to commemorate it (nothing vulgar or explicit). Some memorable ones include a hot-air ballon duel, a flood of molasses, and a cockfighter killed by his
own bird. Not really a read but something fun to skim through for a while. If I had my own place and I was the type of person to host ... things that people show up for, and had a coffee table, this would be something I would put on it.

I forgot where I found this book or how I even came across it. It might've been something that popped up as an Amazon recommendation, or I heard about it on a podcast, I really can't remember. Of course, I laughed through the whole book as you probably expect I would, though I do expect most people I know to laugh at it too.

Books of 2019: Quarter 1

I know, I tell myself all the time, "why don't you just write about the books you read right after you read them, then you won't procrastinate and end up rushing through this every three months?" Or in this case, a whole year. Plus, as you might've noticed, I haven't been writing as much as before so that definitely pushed these further and further out. But here's to getting started again, by catching up with last year's reading list.


John Dies at the End by David Wong

"The finished creature seemed to be assembled from spare parts. It had a tail like a scorpion curling up off its back. It walked on seven- yes, seven - legs, each ending in one of those small, pink infantile hands. It had a head that was sort of an inverted heart shape, a bank of mismatched eyes in an arc over a hooked, black beak, like a parrot's. On its head, no kidding, it had a tuft of neatly groomed blond hair that I swear on my mother's grave was a wig, held on with a rubber band chinstrap."

"And so, feeling like men trying to work a jigsaw puzzle blindfolded and using only our butt cheeks to grip the pieces, we left."

David Wong and John (both fake names) are high school friends from Undisclosed (to protect themselves) that specialize in cases of the paranormal thanks to a drug that increases their awareness, allowing them to see and interact with the supernatural as well as a couple of other heightened sense abilities. The main chunk of the story is Wong telling his story to a reporter that specializes in the weird and paranormal. It's a story about their first encounter with the Soy Sauce drug at a high school party, to fighting off demons at a Las Vegas seminar, to starting a business fighting the supernatural with a boombox and a baseball bat, all the way to stopping an alien invasion from an alternate dimension with a twist ending and plenty of dick jokes thrown in. Honestly, the best way I can describe the story is it's kind of like if you and your buddies from high school were sent to save the world.

Have you watched this TV show on SyFy called Happy!? This book is basically like that - it's insane the things that happen and every chapter will leave you with a lot of "what the fuck did I just read" moments, encouraging you onward just to find how much further Wong can push the creative envelope. I read another of Wong's book awhile back, Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits, and this one is just as ... imaginative. It's funny and exciting and moments where I just had to go back and reread the last sentence because my brain just couldn't comprehend what I'd just read.

The Night Angel Trilogy by Brent Weeks

I assume it would be easier to talk about all three at the same time (plus it'll save time).

The Way of the Shadows (Book One):

"At first everything was curses and beatings. Azoth couldn't do anything right. But curses were just air, and beatings were just momentary pain. Blint would never maim Azoth, and if he chose to kill him, there was nothing Azoth could do to stop him anyway.

It was the closest thing to safety he'd ever known."

"Just by looking at a man's face, he could judge instantly: parry left, hesitate, lunge, clear. A man died and fell far enough away that he didn't impede Kylar's movements. Next, sweep right, roll in, bear fist to nose. Spin, hamstring, throat. Parry, riposte. Stab."

Azoth, a street urchin just trying to survive, dreams of power to protect himself and his friends - to no longer be afraid. It is this dream that drives him to risk his life following Durzo Blint, the city's greatest wetboy, and request to be his apprentice. Under Blint's tutelage, Azoth will learn the ways of a wetboy: to blend with his environment, the tools of his trade, and, most importantly, to kill. But there is more going on within the kingdom and it may be up to the assassin to stop an invasion.

Shadow's Edge (Book Two):

"Kylar is Shadow in Twilight, a growing colossus with one foot planted in the day and another in the night, but a shadow is an ephemeral beast and twilight must either darken into night or lighten into day."

Kylar Stern leaves to a neighboring city now that the Godking's forces have taken over the city, and the Godking himself has arrived. Seeking to create a life of peace for himself, he abandons the way of the shadows. That life is interrupted when he finds out his best friend and rightful king of Cenaria is alive, hiding in the prisons below the city. Knowing that Logan is alive and could unite the varying resistance factions against the Godking, Kylar must decide if he can abandon his new way of peace to take up the sword again.

Beyond the Shadows (Book Three):

"Kylar had longed to be more than a guild rat. He'd longed to be more than a wetboy. Now, he was more than a man. The rules didn't apply to him."

"In the tumult of clashing arms, grunts, curses, clashing sword on sword or sword on shield, the thump of cudgels hitting flesh, the muted crack of breaking limbs or shattered skulls, the whistle of air escaping from a throat instead of a mouth, the familiar stench of blood and bile and death-loosened bowels and the sweat of exertion and the sweat of fear, Kylar was suddenly serene."

Kylar Stern has returned to the Way of the Shadows to save his kingdom, but lost his new life of peace. With the Godking dead, Cenaria's army plans to march North to rescue their queen from a newly established Godking who is planning an invasion of his own with creatures from myth. As two armies march against each other, Kylar will need to assassinate his most formidable target yet - a goddess. Additionally, other characters that we've gotten to know over the other two books will come to the ends of their journeys.

This series is probably the reason I didn't get around to putting up these reviews every three months like I was doing (plus, you know, the not-writing). If you've ever talked to me about books, or if I've ever tried to force a book on to you, I've mentioned The Magicians trilogy as the books to read. The Night Angel trilogy though is my favorite series and the one I've read and re-read the most. It has everything: Action, Adventure, Mystery, Romance, Camaraderie, Magic, Ancient Lore, Triumph of good over evil, a Large Cast of characters with their own individual plot lines. Plus, it isn't bogged down by pointless songs, or unpronounceable spells, or wordy descriptions that tend to plague other High Fantasy novels. It's easy to read but if you move to fast, you can miss all the subtle things that don't immediately jump out at you. Though that's part of the fun of re-reading it and picking up on them again. And because of all that, it was so, so hard to find the words of just how to quickly summarize the story without ruining it with my own shitty writing. Back in college, I had a writing assignment of analyzing a song, and the issue was that the deeper and deeper you look into something, the less enchanted you become by it and the more you start to become frustrated with it. I was really afraid that writing even a short piece about these books might do that for me.

The Enemy by Lee Child

"'What are you going to do with this strength?' she asked me.

I didn't answer. I never did.

'You're going to do the right thing,' she said."

"No, the twentieth century's signature sound is the squeal and clatter of tank tracks on a paved street. That sound was heard in Warsaw, and Rotterdam, and Stalingrad, and Berlin. Then it was heard again in Budapest and Prague, and Seoul and Saigon. It's a brutal sound. It's the sound of fear. It speaks of a massive overwhelming advantage in power. And it speaks of remote, impersonal indifference."

This story goes back to Jack Reacher's time in the military police when he was still with the army, not the drifter character we are introduced to in the first book and movie. Reacher is ringing in the new year recently posted to a base in North Carolina when he receives a call that a general is dead in a motel where he shouldn't be. After a quick search, the general's briefcase is discovered missing along with unknown classified information about a meeting he was supposed to be attending. A few hours later, it is reported that the general's wife has been murdered. Reacher is now on a case to find the missing files, but the deeper he digs, the more the enemy turns out to be the last person he expected. and one that he just might not be able to handle.

Yes, another Jack Reacher novel. At the time I bought this book, I really thought it wasn't going to make this quarter's list, but I practically sprinted through it. Not kidding, I think it took me a week to get through it. Child's writing is great, the pacing is perfect. I've read and posted enough of these books by now that it isn't worth going into detail about how this book reads and stuff like that. An interesting side plot to this story involves an event in Reacher's personal life: coming to terms with his mother's death. This seems to help humanize Reacher, putting his character into the context of being a son and brother and not just the drifter we've grown to know from previous books.

Grand Adventure Day 17: Blackpink!

So, tonight was the reason I extended my trip for several more days. But first, the even better news: We've got coffee at the hostel again! I spent the morning trying to finish packing as quietly as possible as the other two guys slept off their hangovers. At one point, I tried to participate in the PokemonGo Community Day event, but the game crashed constantly so that didn't work. And that concludes what I did the entire morning.

I met up with Tina and her friend at the concert site. People packed the sidewalks, selling posters and wallets and other stuff with the Blackpink members' pictures on them, some of them probably unlicensed, some of them fan-art drawings.

I also got (aka "spent a lot on") some official merchandise like pins and a keychain, and a pen I think I lost. Also, depending upon the amount of money you spent, there was a drawing for a chance to win some prizes. Surprisingly, I think between the three of us, we got all three of the items: a Blackpink lightstick USB charger, soap? (I think that was one of them), and an Ipad signed BY ALL 4 MEMBERS! Since I'd gotten there late, I missed the two of them showing off the Ipad to some students of theirs. Luckily he's a much better person than I am. "Hey, look what I won! What's that, you had to spend all your allowance on tickets and can't even afford to buy anything else. Awww, sorry." Taunting children, another reason I can't be a teacher. With time left until the concert started, we hung out at a nearby karaoke center to kill time. Oh, they also taught me to say, "I'm a North Korean spy," which I now don't remember the words. I'd been looking for something to say to the old women who stare at me on the trains. Everyone else's eyes are focused on their phones, but the old women just stare at me. All of them. All the time.

Tina and I made our way to our seats with about an hour left until the concert. Alex's (I knew I wrote his name someplace in this notebook) ticket was for the pit/floor area. That I don't have a Blackpink member locked away in a newly constructed basement means that he didn't manage to grab any of them and drag them outside as we planned aka, as I asked and he just nervously shook his head and walked away from Tina's weird cousin. "Come on, we're going to Hawaii!" as the bag goes over her head and I lead her away from the concert. *That's a joke, please don't send anyone to my house, I wouldn't even know how to build a basement... though I'm sure there's a video someplace... not that I would go through the effort...

Back to the concert. To make sure I didn't miss a moment, I headed to the restroom to drain every single ounce of liquid from my body. From what I gathered from the stadium layout, the people in charge must've closed off all but one restroom each for men and women. Since they frown upon me entering the women's restroom to document the goings-on, I can only give you what I experienced in the men's restroom. Obviously, for an event like this, I am prepared to wait in a line. What I wasn't prepared for was how... intimate standing in line was, not in the line out the door to the restroom but behind each other at each urinal. With all five or six urinals occupied, lines formed behind each person at each urinal, about four or five people deep with the stalls right behind them. Wow, was the restroom that big? you ask. No, it was not. To say they stood close enough that the next guy in line could've held it for me while I played games on my phone wouldn't be an exaggeration. And if you went to sento with me or you're my grandma, you have an idea of just how close they stood to each other. I opted for a stall because I knew I would be in there for a while, negotiating with, threatening my bladder and bowels. "Okay, I'm serious you fuckers, you better get everyone out of there now because we're not coming back. I'm not joking." Then I'd stand up, pull up my jeans, stand there for a couple seconds, then sit back down. "Okay, seriously, last chance, no fucking surprises. None of this 'oops, just a couple more drops' or 'oh, one more tiny turd left behind'." And repeat until I was certain my body wouldn't betray me. In case you were curious, this was also my prep for the three hours Avengers: Endgame movie.

When I eventually got back to my seat, Tina helped me set up the lightstick she got me. Even though I said I didn't want one as I saw it as just one more thing to pack into my stuffed luggage and then find a place in my cramped room, I'm really happy she ignored my request and bought it anyways. If you watch any of my videos, or just look up a live concert on Youtube and see the sea of pink lightsticks moving in unison, well, it's kind of amazing ... and a little scary only in that I tend to think of any group synchronized activity as the beginnings of a cult and at any moment we'll be told to sacrifice the person sitting next to us to the glory of Morrowyllx or some other obscure feaster of souls and the worst part being I won't know what's going on until the moment the knife gets plunged into my chest since I don't speak Korean (I need to learn a new language).

Pre-show set up

Then the show started! The shining lights, the blaring speakers, the flashing screens in the background, the screaming crowd ... it was a lot to take in all at once, especially for my first ever concert. At that time, the stories about people fainting from excitement or anxiety attacks crept into my head. Subtly, I took a lot of deep breaths and focused on the seat back in front of me, thinking about how embarrassing it would be to faint in my cramped seat. Seriously, though, my plane seat had more leg room.

I got my bearing back just as Blackpink got on stage. I want to say they started the concert off with their newest song at the time, "Ddu Du Ddu Du" but I don't have a video to prove it. At the start I was really hesitant about recording the show since Tina said she saw people escorted out from other concerts she attended in the past for recording the concert. Only when I realized EVERYONE'S phones were out and security didn't care did I get the courage to do it too. Luckily I'm taller than most and the person who was supposed to be in the seat in front of me must've been murdered earlier in the day because s/he wasn't there (and death is the only thing that would've stopped me from coming). This way, I could keep my phone low while recording and not block my view or distract me from the show. I tried to get clips of every single song, even the solo acts they performed. It's old news now, but Jennie performed her solo debut song "Solo" and they showed the music video on the big screens. Some guy from Big Bang also performed a couple songs on his own. I think Tina said something along the lines of it being blasphemous that I don't know these songs or who that guy was. Between songs, the group talked on stage and Tina provided me with translations.

Hopefully those videos show up (I'm still not sure if they loaded correctly). This is the best quality I've got so now I'm not even sure why I was so scared they were going to kick me out for recording. When they finished all of their songs (at that point, I think they only have a dozen or so, and maybe half of them were singles) I saw people walking out of the arena. Well, if Marvel Studios taught me anything, just because the credits roll doesn't mean the movie is over and so I planned to sit there until they turned the arena lights back on. On the back of the placard we all got were the lyrics to a verse of one of their songs which the crowd was supposed to sing repeatedly to bring the group back out for an encore performance, like summoning Beetlejuice or something. That particular verse had a couple lines in English, so I got to shout those parts with the crowd.

The encore section was a different performance from the rest of the show. Instead of emitting the energy and excitement that they previously had, it was a lot more comfortable, more like I was watching a group of people perform at a karaoke bar or something, though with hundreds of other people. No fireworks or flashing lights or fancy clothes. Most of the arena lights were on and the four of them either stood or sat together wearing what looked like just regular clothes, not dancing across the stage in flashy concert clothing. The encore section seemed to invite the rest of the crowd to sing along rather than just watch in awe as we had done through the previous performances.

After the show, Tina and I headed to a less crowded train station to hang out. Most of the food places were already closed for the night which surprised me. Not that they were already closed, but that the concert went on that long. At the time of the concert, Blackpink just released their first album, which gave them, I think, just 9 songs in total so I thought the concert was going to be a lot shorter. We ended up grabbing donuts and coffee and hanging out in the station so we both could catch our respective trains home. I managed to walk back to the hostel without anyone mugging me for my concert merchandise stuffed into a huge plastic bag. Not that it isn't safe and I'm actually worried about being mugged, but just thinking of how embarrassing it would be that I don't have any money but an entire bag full of Blackpink merchandise.

Grand Adventure Day 16: Last Palaces

The rain from the previous day stopped. Originally, I came up with a plan to waste another day hopping from cafe to cafe, drinking coffee and writing. Since the rain stopped, I decided to try to use the last two tickets from the packet I picked up the day I hung out with my cousin. First off, I mixed up the names of the palaces and ended up going to the one we already went to on the previous weekend. After a walk, I made it to the correct palace, Changgyeonggung Palace.

This is what I imagine fall looks like

I bet there was something really cool in there

There was a fire someplace. No, I didn't start it.

Walked around almost the entire palace grounds. I have no idea how big the palace grounds actually were or how they compared to the other 3 I visited, but this one just felt bigger. Also, no I'm not going to do any research. Besides the forest I saw people walking laps in, there was also a lake and a greenhouse (which I don't have good pictures of). Also, there was a fire someplace. I didn't get to see it, though I did smell it and saw the smoke from a ways off. My cousin messaged me later to play the dumb tourist card and try to jump on the fire truck.

The last ticket would get me into Jongmyo Shrine, which was pretty close and apparently I got there right in time. As it is a spiritual place (or was it sacred place, I always get them mixed up, if there is a difference), which ever it is, you'll either need a guide, or you'll need to be in time for one of their group tours based on the language the tour will be conducted. I got there with about 10 minutes until the last tour of the day, which also happened to be in English. So I just hung around until the tour started. If I remember correctly, most, if not all, of the emperors are symbolically enshrined there and rituals are still held there. Before I start giving out more wrong information ... look, here's some pictures

After the tour, I hung around at a nearby park playing Pokemon. Between two stops and a gym, I stumbled upon a Charmander nest! Not joking, there would always be about two or three spawning at a time and almost as soon as I caught one, another would pop up. I would've stayed probably forever, but then my hands started to go numb. Unexpectedly, the weather turned and it just got really, really cold all of a sudden. My brain went into the "how long do you think we can survive out here?" mode while actively debating if it was worth it to keep on playing. Shivering, I made my way back to a train station. Took it to Itaewon to grab a kebab for dinner. I'm really going to miss them, we don't have them back home, or at least not that I know of ... unless you count Arby's since they're selling gyros now which are basically the same thing, right.

Back at the hostel, I met my two new roommates. Oh, I think I also forgot to mention, somehow I managed to have the room all to myself for the past couple of days, just me and three other empty bunks. Both of them were Americans from the military base and here for a nearby metal concert happening right down the street, a group from someplace in Europe. Instead of going with them, I stayed back at the hostel to get a head start on my packing, at which point I spent a half hour looking for a missing slipper, the ones you are supposed to wear around the hostel, not my own slipper. Eventually I found it, packed with my own luggage.

Grand Adventure Day 15: Library Day

Today it rained. It rained all day. I spent the morning sitting at the hostel dining table drinking coffee (no we're still out, I went out to the train station and bought this one), reading and talking with Hsiu, the newest worker at the hostel that started on my first day. Once the claustrophobia kicked in, I packed up some stuff, grabbed my jacket, and headed to the Seoul Metropolitan Library.

Besides the normal stuff I like about libraries, I liked the painted benches that were near the staircases and elevators

Also, on one of the floors (no I don't remember which) there was a brief exhibit on the construction of Seoul and a display of gifts presented by dignitaries from around the world.

I found some tables and an empty chair that I could occupy for an hour or two. I'm not sure which occurred first: writer's block or hunger. Either way, I headed back to the underground shopping area to stay out of the rain and began walking until I found a shop selling dumplings. I also finally did a Giratina raid in this country! Unfortunately, I didn't catch it. After walking around for a bit, I headed back to the library and took back the exact seat that I vacated an hour or so earlier. Even worse than not catching that Giratina, I fell into the trap of reviewing my work ... which results in questioning the legitimacy of everything I'd written just moments earlier. So, of course, nothing new got done. Eventually, the librarian came around to let everyone know they were closing up soon. No, I don't know exactly what she said, but I like to think that I understand "Get the fuck out" in any language. Went back to that Indian restaurant near the hostel for dinner but this time they gave me an English menu. Got Indian Butter Chicken curry, which, if you're one of my two old co-workers, you know the addiction to it.


Oh, and if you cared, here's part of what I wrote that day:

From my viewing orb I watched the band of heroes surround Bobby at the far side of the cave. As always, Bobby was milking his upcoming death scene, always the over-actor. Over actress? He, or she, had only been working at our dungeon for a week or so and I've been thinking it rude to ask a 90 foot long giant scorpion if it prefers the male or female pronoun. Either way, Bobby was putting on a show, backing away slowly, claws snapping, it's giant stinger clanging off iron shields. Acid spray mixed with the occasional jet of smoke and steam pumped into the chamber messed with their lone archer's aim, causing arrows to bounce harmlessly off of the scorpion's steel plating.

Soon enough, Bobby found itself trapped at the far-side of the cavern, exactly as scripted. The fighters were kept just out of range, the elf's arrows couldn't find hit anything vital, and their wizard was busy charging up a spell which we could use in our own finale. All of it according to plan. Then I got up from my chair and starred at the orb. Stared hard. Two fighters, one elf, one wizard. I unrolled the scroll, a list of today's raiding party complete with an inventory of their gear collected by the local innkeeper. Two fighters armed with shields, one with a sword, one with an axe. An elf with a bow and long knife. A wizard with a staff and a short knife at the base, and a ... The rogue! I abandoned the viewing orb and looked out through the illusionary veil that concealed by room hidden high above the cavern. Where the hell did he go!

I took in the whole scene again. They stood at the front entrance and slowly worked the fight arond the cavern as predicted. Bobby might've come to our humble tier two dungeon just to ease himself into retirement but he was still a true professional. Hopefully he hadn't forgotten about the rogue, as I had, but just in case, I needed to keep an eye out to make sure none of my team got injured or killed.

There! my eyes spotted the faint shadowy movements close to the ceiling, just about level with myself but 30 meters across. That bastard. Quickly, I ran back to the viewing orb and watched the playback. Upon entering the cavern, he had been the second to charge into the fray, a stupid move for a thief, and gotten himself knocked to the side. Bobby batted him away with her tail, though light enough that he wouldn't sustain any major injuries. Something like that, after all, could lead to some severe legal issues, even the shutting down of the dungeon itself. I guess Bobby didn't hit the rogue hard enough because as the fight with the rest of the party progressed, the rogue got up and began quietly and slowly, scaling the side of the wall, moving stealthily enough not to attract attention. And it worked because he was high up here, with a very large, possibly enchanted, probably poisoned knife aiming to plunge down onto Bobby.

This needed to be timed perfectly. I waited until the rogue was in position. Waited until he dropped to deliver what he hoped to be the killing blow. Just as he dropped, I clanged a rock off of Bobby's steel plating, the plate closest to where the assassin was sure to land. Then I bounced a small reflection spell off the same plate, blinding the rogue for just a second. Enough time for Bobby to act. He knocked back the two fighters with its claws, then swung a wide arc with its tail to startle the group, ending with an upward swing, catching the rogue mid-fall with the backside of the stinger and sending him back into the wall. The wizard finally managed to fully charge his spell. I hit the button activating the shield curtain, allowing the spell to explode just a couple meters from Bobby, the room simultaneously filling with a thick black smoke.

I heard coughing. "What the fuck was that Kyler!" exclaimed someone, probably one of the fighters as they were usually the loudest.

"It was just supposed to be a standard piercing spell. I swear I did the chant right," replied the wizard.

By the time the smoke cleared, Bobby made it through the trap door and a scorpion skeleton put in its place, along with a single chest of copper coins, enough to get the group through to the next village. This was only a Tier Two dungeon after all, they shouldn't be expecting a whole lot. I waited, watching as the party go their bearings after the smoke cleared, then split up the coins between the 5 of them, and then exited through another doorway that opened after boss Bobby was defeated.

"Okay, we're clear!" I announced, my voice magically booming throughout the entire dungeon, "Let's get this all cleared up and prepped for tomorrow." I'd heard from the innkeeper there was already another raiding party setting up for an early morning quest tomorrow.

On cue, teams of orcs spewed through hidden doors armed with brooms and buckets: some to clean up the mess left behind, others to create a new mess, this was supposed to be a dungeon. I went down to the infirmary. I didn't witness anything bad, but best to check it out myself. Downstairs, our lone cleric was looking after my front-line crew: the slimes, orcs, giant spiders, even Bobby, anyone who interacted with the raiding party. Even Gregory, the old hermit that warned the raiders not to go into the cave, though I have no idea why. When I asked, he just thought it best in case they cursed him on the way in. "You worry too much," I said, shaking my head.


So, this story was supposed to be about the people and creatures that reset dungeons after a raiding party has been through it. The main character is the Dungeon Master who is in charge of this dungeon. The plot goes that one of the raiding party members leaves something behind and ends up peeking behind the veil, seeing what goes on behind the scenes of the dungeon. The thought that derailed this whole thing was the idea that if one dungeon is controlled by the government, then what's stopping the government from actually controlling ALL dungeons, then what really is the point if dungeons are just escape rooms? And that got me stuck trying to figure out the Tier system for dungeons and how much the government can actually control. And, as it's been a whole year since I originally wrote this, no, I haven't gone back to it yet.

Grand Adventure Day 14: I Did Nothing

This will be a short one. I got up and did my normal routine which was stupid since I still needed to wait until 10am to use the washing machine. Since the hostel is still out of laundry detergent, I took the caretaker's advice and just used shampoo. More importantly, they're out of coffee which meant another visit to the Dunkin Donuts at Hapjeong station. I got my breakfast sandwich and coffee this time ... from the same cashier working the other day. From the look on her face, I know that everyone in this country is going to be happier once I leave - I've been nothing but an inconvenience to everyone's lives.

After a load of laundry, which I spent 45 minutes watching Youtube videos, I finally got out of the hostel with a plan. The first stop was the movie theater I couldn't find on Sunday to buy tickets for Bohemian Rhapsody, 4 hours early. 11,000won is pretty cheap compared to the theaters back home.

In my defense, it was dark Sunday night and, back home, theaters basically stand on their own in their own, easy to see, building. It's a little hard to find from three stories down. Ticket in hand and 4 hours to kill, I took a 30 minute train ride to Itaewon to find a bookstore. Well, first I had lunch at one of the 4 different kebab shops within eyesight of Itaewon station. From there, a walk up the hill took me to the bookstore I scouted online last night. I'd been going through the one Jack Reacher novel a little faster than I expected and decided I might need another book (I've been spending a lot of time waiting around, or eating alone). Unfortunately, as it happens in every bookstore, I had my sights set on just one particular book but I ended up still browsing all the shelves. I even picked up a couple that I wanted to read and seriously considered taking all of them, once again over-burdening my already full duffel bag and backpack. In the end, I did only buy the one book, a collection of Jack Reacher short stories.

On the walk back to the station, an Instinct player took over a bunch of gyms so I just followed his/her path of yellow gyms all the way back to the station, putting a pokemon in every gym available. This is also probably the reason I made it back to the theater with just 10 minutes to spare. That, or the book shelf browsing.

The movie was good. If you're expecting some sort of in-depth review, well you will be disappointed. The only thing I've got is that the pacing in the beginning felt a little rushed but other than that, I liked it. I probably knew all of the songs only because I spend every weekend at the orchid farm, and on the drive there and back, if we're not listening to the radio, Dad plays one of a handful of CDs he owns, one of them being Queen's Greatest Hits.

I decided to hang around the Hongik area after the movie. That really is the best part about staying in Hapjeong, that I'm just one stop away from the Hongik University stop and all the cheap street food. I had another corndog thing with sugar and ketchup, which I spilled a lot of on the street; more fried chicken; another bread with egg thing. It started to rain so I couldn't take advantage of the free entertainment as the buskers weren't out that night. Picked up a doughnut on the way back to the hostel, though I really should've bought coffee too. I managed to find coffee back at the hostel, except it was all in capsules which we don't have a machine to use. I tried to make tea instead, but I couldn't figure it out ... I'm dumb. Also I finished the first Jack Reacher novel I brought with me so I guess it was a good thing I went today to get that second book.

Grand Adventure Day 13

I slept badly, my only guess was due to heartburn from eating spicy Mexican food last night. With all the Korean food I've been eating, who expected that the thing to give me heartburn would be Mexican food. Dragged myself out of bed late and was going to do a load of laundry, but the hostel was out of laundry detergent. Finally, I headed for the Seoul Museum of Art near the City Hall stop. Grabbed a ham and cheese muffin from a nearby bakery. Actually, I'm not sure if it was "nearby" as I kinda got lost along the way. Eventually, I found the right street to turn down and got to the museum.

The first exhibit I came across was artist activism against the rapid westernization of Korean culture forced onto society by the government in preparation for the Olympics (I don't remember what year). As a dumb foreigner with no background on Korean history or folklore, I really didn't understand a lot of it, but obviously that's not going to stop me from looking around.

The room I wandered into after than was an entire exhibit dedicated to one artist. It was interesting to see how her subject material changed over time, as well as the style she painted. I don't have any pictures of any of the pieces since they had signs in English asking people not to take pictures. Some were painted with dark, bold strokes; others had a pastel colors with a more fantastical feel to them; portraits of people she met on her travels; self-portraits of herself mixed with traits/features of people she admires/wants to be.

My favorite room was the one depicting the future. Maybe satirizing is a better description. An anti-surveillance hoodie made of what looked like a thermal blanket. A series of flashing screens asking questions about the nature of AI and if electric sheep dream? A critique on how often we think about things compared to our own mortality as a man had a computer to track his brain on how often he thought about shopping vs how often he thought about death. My favorite, and possibly the creepiest thing I've ever seen, a prototype for an End of Life machine: basically just a machine that strokes your arm and is supposed to provide comfort to you in your final moments, the robotic voice droning, "I'm here to ease your pain because none of your family and friends could be here." It sent a shiver down my spine on how real it seemed.

Wandered out of the museum and started toward the Deoksugung Palace close by (I really wanted to get my money's worth from that ticket booklet)

In one of my few instances of excellent timing, I also managed to arrive just in time for a changing of the guard ceremony.

After the ceremony, people could get up close to the guards and take pictures with them. Inside, I walked through a garden and a large grassy area. I think by this point I may have been starting to get bored of palaces as all the architecture started to look the same. This one did have a couple of other unique features:

Not sure what was in here

A fountain

A pond

Also, there was a short tour in a smaller building of the historical clothing worn by the elite and the emperor.

Wanting to leave, but too early to go back to the hostel, an example of vacation-Alan popped up and decided to head back to the Dongdaemun Design Plaza just because it was a place I could just hang out and either write or read without anyone bothering me. I got there and instead immediately started playing PokemonGo, taking the gym in the middle of the plaza. Then wandered a couple blocks away to do a raid. Getting back to the Dongdaemun Design Plaza, I decided on Quiznos for dinner. I know what you're thinking, what the hell am I doing eating Quiznos? Well, there is a good reason: on the sign outside they were advertising, if I remember correctly, a sandwich called "Traditional" which was supposed to have Bulgogi beef, korean vegetables, and hot sauce. See, that sounds different than anything I've seen state-side, and it sounds pretty good. Well, the sign on the outside had it, but I couldn't find it on the menu inside. So, I'm standing in front of the cashier trying to figure out what to say, so I just told him "traditional" and he just smiled, nodded, said something in Korean, and then told me the price, as if he was like, "Yeah, man, I got you. I know exactly what you're looking for." Unfortunately, when I got back to the hostel, I found that we were not on the same page - I unwrapped the sandwich to find a basic ham and cheese with veggies. Well, luckily, I also bought some Toppoki from a vendor at the subway station, so that made me feel a little better.